'They were wearing gym clothes and brought their lawyers': 15+ Wedding photographers who knew the couple was headed for a breakup before the ceremony ended

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Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Aug 27, 2023 11:00 AM EDT

These wedding photographers have some pretty good hunches about which couples will last a lifetime, and which will be divorced by next week. If you do that job for long enough, you learn the telltale signs of a relationship that's ripping at the seams. 

For lots of people, weddings are framed as one of the most important days of your life. It's the day that you formally agree to spend all your days with someone you love more than anyone else. The best part is that your family and friends are there to celebrate with you by dancing the night away. Wedding photographers are there to capture the entire day, so they see how everyone is acting behind the scenes. 

One photographer shared that they knew the couple was ill-fated because during the "in between moments," no one talked. It sounds really awkward and forced! It's the little things that can spell out trouble. But when the entire family disagrees with each other, or the family knows the couple isn't good together, it's just even more clear that divorce is coming. 

Read through this interesting thread below. Then, these crafty cats are having a great time sneaking into places they know they're not allowed to be. 

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  • 01
    Flower - so
    via Danie Franco on Unsplash
  • 02
    Font - Wedding photographers of Reddit, what was the sign that 'this' marriage is going to fail?
    via u/Adi_Zav
  • 03
    Font - heatherkan Number 1 is constant arguing, especially when there's an undertone of disgust/disdain. Insistence on very specific minor details in an obsessive way to the exclusion of actually njoying a session / the wedding is often a sign as well. (for example, the girl yelling at the guy for "messing up her hair" when he tries to cuddle her for a photo, or a guy who harangues me in 20+ emails trying to manipulate my pricing list or look for a loophole to get a secret deal instead of consid
    via u/heatherkan
  • 04
    Font - I actually see enough good/bad couples that I specifically advertise and brand to attract the kind of couples that tend to be genuinely loving toward each other.
    via u/heatherkan
  • 05
    Font - IssaLlama They smush the cake when she says no
    via u/IssaLlama
  • 06
    Font - lowcashloser. When the groom asked if I could cover for him while he fted one of the guests. Worst position to be in ever.
    via u/lowcashloser
  • 07
    Font - Cutiethrowsaway Bride passively agreed all the grooms ideas. He was a bit of an as and didnt even give her a chance to suggest anything.
    via u/Cutiethrowsaway
  • 08
    Product - MonsieurAK They were wearing gym clothes and brought their lawyers.
    via u/MonsieurAK
  • 09
    Font - GreatJanitor Never a photographer, but used to DJ weddings. The bride acting like the center of attention, that's to be expected, honestly it's more her day than the groom's. However, when 90% of the reception is her NOT with him, but with her family and friends and his mom isn't even allowed to sit at the head table with her family and friends you can probably measure the time between that reception and divorce using a stopwatch.
    via u/GreatJanitor
  • 10
    Font - redditiswhatimon . Not trying to get too off topic, but I own a wedding videography business and 2 summers ago I shot back to back weddings for 2 best friends both named Shawna (both married 1 week apart). Both weddings seemed to be completely orchestrated by the brides with both grooms completely un-interested during our pre-wedding consultation meetings. Ok not too odd I suppose, but it was a huge red flag that neither of them had any input, suggestions etc.
    via u/redditiswhatimon
  • 11
    Font - Fast forward I email them their videos for "preview" these were very raw videos intending for them to see my creative direction in order for them to provide feedback before I started final touches (they were both very picky so I assumed many changes would be requested hence the reason I sent the raw previews). I received only one response from one of the Shawnas "yay I can't wait, the four of us are going to get together to watch the videos and we'll let you know"
    via u/redditiswhatimon
  • 12
    Font - A week goes by, then two weeks, a month and nothing. I send several follow up emails, tried calling them and nothing! To this day I still have no idea what happened to the Shawna's. They both paid in full but never got their final product. There were even clips that contained stark red rendering warnings on the clips. Sections of the videos that audio was muted because I hadn't synced it up yet. In my 4 years doing this, this is the most bizarre story. Never have I had a bride not want th
    via u/redditiswhatimon
  • 13
    Font - And for those who might be curious I did reach out and offer a refund as my assumption was they completely hated the previews but were too nice to voice an opinion, but those messages all went un-answered. At this point I have to assume neither couple worked out.
    via u/redditiswhatimon
  • 14
    Font - ClashTryNots In one of the photos I took both the bride and a groom held up a sign that said "This marriage is going to fail."
    via u/ClashTryNots
  • 15
    Font - epandrsn If the groom keeps talking about how expensive everything is, it's sort of a red flag. Some people also just don't seem happy or they're doing it to appease their parents. Can't see these ones ending well. That said, most couples I've photographed and have remained friends with are still together. The few that I've thought would have gone south didn't stay in touch.
    via u/epandrsn
  • 16
    Font - [deleted] Just a non-happy vibe all day.
    via u/deleted
  • 17
    Font - spazz4life Not a photographer but I attended this wedding (cousin was the groom): From the get-go the outdoor wedding was threatened by a rain forecast. The ceremony was performed by the bride's grandfather and had to be reminded of groom's name mid-vows.
    via u/spazz4life
  • 18
    Font - Then, immediately after "you may now kiss the bride" there was a clap of thunder and instant torrential downpour sending the guests running to the reception tent....only to discover that the chairs were supposed to be reused from the ceremony... the same chairs that were now soaking wet. (Imagine the great grandparents being escorted up the hill in the mud.) every man plus me ran for chairs. It was a mess. She left him less than a year later.
    via u/spazz4life
  • 19
    Gesture - sulphurephoenix13. When the bride is making out with the best man instead.
    via u/sulphurephoenix13
  • 20
    Font - phoenix-corn I can only imagine what the photographer and other people involved behind the scenes thought of my wedding: everything was chosen to make him or his family happy and appeased that I wasn't spending too much of their or his money. But the tell would have been the echoing silence any time something major wasn't happening.
    via u/phoenix-corn
  • 21
    Font - Waiting to go into the hall and be announced? Dead f ing silence. Riding in the limo? Silence. Nobody making jokes. Riding around taking photos? Same thing. No music, no jokes, no talking. It was the most awkward day of my godd life, at least behind the scenes. (I will ALWAYS wonder if he had been sleeping with one of the groomsmen. He had no male friends, I wouldn't let one of the women he had slept with be in the wedding party, and so he had these two guys from work that he didn't know
    via u/phoenix-corn
  • 22
    Font - Ugh. Anyway. Not the best man, but the other guy? He just kept on buying my new spouse really expensive gifts, like $250 birthday presents, and sending him odd movies like Sideways and Little Miss Sunshine. I guess this stopped about a year before the divorce, but he also hadn't been home much and had been working outside the country then. It was super godd strange and even though he has since dated other women I will never not wonder. :/)
    via u/phoenix-corn
  • 23
    Font - marrieditguy Ran sound for a wedding once where the groom passed out twice. Divorced in less than a year.
    via u/marrieditguy
  • 24
    Font - UncleJay74 When you're shooting some candids of the bride in the dressing room as she's getting ready and she looks over at her friend and says, "I seriously don't know why I'm doing this. I hate this mother fer and his whole family." is a pretty good sign.
    via u/UncleJay74
  • 25
    Font - shinyquartersquirrel · The groom winked at me during the ceremony. Then my assistant said to me after, "Uhm, I'm pretty sure the groom winked at me during the ceremony." Awkward.
    via u/shinyquartersquirrel

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